Thursday, 18 February 2010

The instinctive shame I feel when I rub vaseline into my crotch, and other musings

Last time I ran over 10 miles my legs hurt, but nowhere near as much as the burning on my inner thighs, around by the little chap. It was like having acid pored onto them. I'm guessing that bit but trust me it was total agony for 2 days.

Anyway now I'm jellying up, but as I rubbed the vaseline into my 'areas' I felt seedy and dirty, like I was preparing to be dealt with by a massive geezer, or a sexually adventurous women. Either option wasn't filling my with good running thoughts so I packed it in and set off.

It reminded me of when I had to deliver some food to a massage palour that was over the road from this cafe I used to DJ in (cafe Calcio as I remember). As the chef and I who walked in there this absolute horror was sitting on a settee rubbing stuff into her 'bits', I shuddered. My mate decided to tell them that it was my birthday (20th) and the grot look up and said,
"Get your Christmas money out then, and we can have some fun!"
I was going to tell her that I'd only been given a tenner off my Uncle David, but I realized that by the state of her I could have got the works and anal, so I shut up and ran off.

Today's plan was to run to Holborn, meet my mate, and run to his house with him through Regents park, and then up the canal.

We got to the park and it was shut, so we ran round it until we got to the canal.......that was shut, it felt like we'd gone on a massive detour, and we were still in the fucking park!

My mate's pace was starting to hurt me but I kept with him until we got to Caledonian rd, he went left and I carried on towards Angel.

My legs were screaming by this point and I'm not ashamed to say that I thought about stopping, but I didn't, and I ran all the way back.

I worked it out as 15 miles, but my mate corrected me and it turned out to be 13.4

My legs are still screaming but my crotch is serene and peaceful.

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